busy equals important

I read this blog the other day and it struck a bunch of different emotions in me. 

I've never thought that working-in home moms are lazy nor do I wonder what they do all day, I know full well what they do because while I do it after working hours and all weekend and they do it all the time. I also know that sometimes I welcome Monday's because I get to go to work and you know pee alone, or have 5 minutes to myself to think or not think and enjoy silence. Also applause to this husband for being so grateful and appreciative to his wife for mothering their children, raising them and knowing how difficult her "job" is!

I also know that sometimes the judgement is coming the other way too. I've felt it from other moms (work-in-home moms) that look down at me (a working-out-of-the-home mom) for "not caring enough to stay at home" or that I'm somehow less than because I send my kids to daycare. It's tough no matter what your situation is. The grass is always greener or so we think.

"It’s true — being a mom isn’t a “job.” A job is something you do for part of the day and then stop doing. You get a paycheck. You have unions and benefits and break rooms. I’ve had many jobs; it’s nothing spectacular or mystical. I don’t quite understand why we’ve elevated “the workforce” to this hallowed status. Where do we get our idea of it? The Communist Manifesto? Having a job is necessary for some — it is for me — but it isn’t liberating or empowering. Whatever your job is — you are expendable. You are a number. You are a calculation. You are a servant. You can be replaced, and you will be replaced eventually. Am I being harsh? No, I’m being someone who has a job. I’m being real."
 

It's true though, no matter how good you are or how much you care about your job- you are expendable and replaceable. It's a sucky reality especially when you've held a lot of your self-worth in your working life. It's not to say you still can't get satisfaction out of your job but consider this....

"In any case, I’m not looking to get into a fight about who is “busier.” We seem to value our time so little, that we find our worth based on how little of it we have. In other words, we’ve idolized “being busy,” and confused it with being “important.” You can be busy but unimportant, just as you can be important but not busy. I don’t know who is busiest, and I don’t care. It doesn’t matter. I think it’s safe to say that none of us are as busy as we think we are; and however busy we actually are, it’s more than we need to be." 

sound familiar? this hit me like a tonne of bricks. YES, I totally equate being busy to being important. If you are busy and stressed then you must be important, or doing important things. It's rather twisted and definitely something I am working on in my life.

But being a mom is not replaceable, being their mom is not expendable. We make mistakes and we are not perfect but either way we love our kids. fiercely.

So whether you are are stay at home mom or a working outside the home mom- high fives! This is a rough gig sometimes, sometimes it's the greatest too.